Before entering college I had a few thoughts in mind: 1) I was going to let go of my past & look forward to the future 2) I was going to keep to myself, not let anyone get to close to me because I was scared of drama (a lot like in high school) ruining my plans and dreams 3) Study my hardest, and make something of myself by doing so Well, numbers 1 & 3 weren't so bad right? Number 2 was my biggest issue. |
When I did enter NSCC I didn't talk to ANYONE. I'm not too shy of a person, but I had my walls up. I figured I'd just make it through by keeping to myself and not making any friends. I also thought I had plenty of friends back in my hometown of Stoneham, so why would I want more!? Making friends always ended up in some sort of embarrassment for me. People would only talk to me first if they wanted some sort of information or to start some sort of fight. I realized I was so scared of this happening in college, that I had closed myself off completely from the world and was missing out on the greatest years of my life. I was also afraid of losing control by going out too much and partying. (Although I'm not that kind of person at all, my fears where out of control). I was also fearful of losing control of homework and due dates and my stress level reaching an all time high. Because of these fears I came to a realization and I decided to make a change in my life. I was driving myself insane with "What Ifs" and "If I don't do well this will happen" and stumbled across the idea for this blog. I made friends with a girl in one of my classes who is actually from Stoneham, but was home schooled so I never knew who she was until now. I was talking to her about my fears and she gave me some advice that I would like to share with you: Fear is something every human has, you just have to be control of it. Don't let it get the best of you. You have to put yourself out there and meet new people. Sure, some will be TOTAL jerks, but others will be kind and generous and want to help you out. Don't be afraid of what might happen, be afraid of what you will miss out on because you've decided to live under a rock. Life is too short to be scared and not take chances. Do what you have to do, like homework, projects, going to work and hanging with friends. Those are things you get one shot at, one shot to do it right. So work and try your hardest, don't be afraid of messing up or losing out. This is college, a new stage in our lives. So lets live it and love it. |
Hey Amanda. I also had walls up in school, well sometimes I still do. I don't know if I'm shy or have a social anxiety or both, but I know there are walls blocking the things I wand to say and the way I want to be in the classroom.
ReplyDeleteIt kills me sometimes because I really want to say something in response to a teacher but once I gather my thoughts, and before I even bring myself to raise my hand, I turn red, sweat, and tremble. It really makes me mad lol. It holds me back, but you are correct. We need to take hold of these fears.
I will never give up trying to get over my fears, and I will never hide from anything I want in life. If it means being right in the middle of the crowd or whatever, I will put myself there, knowing it will be ridiculously hard. But what I want in life leads me, and nothing will stop me from getting there. Good luck to you and your fight :)
I like the way you think, and the fact that you had the courage to write this blog for us all to read. Thanks for the advice. And yes, life really is too short to not take chances, especially when your dreams are waiting for you on the other side.
Wow! Powerful advice from both of you. Its not easy to be in new situations, especially college! There is so many people around that you dont know and sometimes it is hard to speak up and be yourself. I just found my voice less than two years ago, and now I won't shut up! Speak up in class, your input has value, dont be shy, and I know that is easier for me to say than for you to do, but its worth it. It will teach you how to 1) Deal with your fears. 2) A little lesson on public speaking and 3) you WILL stand out to your professor! Good luck in your struggle with shyness. Overcome your fears, you will feel amazing!
ReplyDeleteThe biggest question about agoraphobia is not able to lead a normal life,constantly afraid of the next attack.
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